Finding Direction: The Wind Vane Chronicles

I’m switchin’ ears.

At least, I’m trying to.

You see . . . you hear . . . the visit to medical specialist #18 in my life – the ENT doctor (plus audiologist) Friday resulted in the finding of the newest and latest diabetically caused health problem, which is that I have a serious hearing impairment.  As in, I can hear you (despite some loss of hearing ability), but I can’t understand you. 

Some of the fragile hairs in the inner canals in my ears have been destroyed due to my diabetes, or more specifically, poor circulation and lack of oxygen to the hairs in my inner ears.  Thus, I have lost to a great extent (in my left ear, in particular), the ability to distinguish words.  I no longer can make a distinction between (comprehend) many words I hear anyone else saying.

I hear you, but I cannot understand what you are saying.

It’s not bad in person, one on one in relatively quiet settings, but put me in a noisy crowd, or most especially on the telephone, and you’ll find that I say "Um, hum" a lot and nod my head – sort of – not sure whether I should have given you a positive or negative response.

This has been bothering me for months and months.  I’d say up to maybe a year and a half to two years ago.  It shows up really badly trying to watch a movie or TV show and not being able to figure out anything anybody is saying.  We’ve been watching TV and DVDS with subtitles on for probably two years, which works great.  We’ve gotten to where we rarely go to movies any more because of my comprehension problem.  It’s a problem for Tom, too, because he cannot hear well.  (I’ll tell you his story next time – it’s a doozy.)

My problems shows up most dramatically when I’m talking on the telephone, and this has been going on a long time.  I’ve had long conversations – like with my mom – in which I have not understand anywhere near half of what the other person is saying.  When it comes to tech support people or the like who speak with a heavy foreign accent, my understanding goes down to about zero.  On the phone, I’m constantly asking people to repeat what they’ve said, even more than once.  It’s embarrassing, among other things (like perhaps agreeing to buy something without realizing what I’m doing).

I found out Friday that this has been greatly compounded by the fact that I’ve always – always – talked on the phone using my left ear.  It’s the one with more hearing loss and the one with rather severe loss of comprehension, both.

So, I’m tryin’ to switch ears.  Saturday morning I had Tom change the shoulder rest on my phone in here in the office to be used on the right shoulder instead of the left.  It doesn’t fit my right shoulder, I’m telling ya!  No matter how I try to position it, it’s awkward and uncomfortable and I keep dropping it.  I know – I’ve been practicing it.  I had Tom go in the other room and call me from his cell phone.  I can’t (okay won’t) tell you what I exclaimed the first time I picked up the phone to try to answer it using my right ear and shoulder rest.  I’ll just say that I told Tom I cannot be answering the phone that way from now on and especially if it’s my MOM! 

Then, I had a couple of real calls yesterday to contend with while fidgeting around with the stupid shoulder rest and switching back and forth between ears, begging the people’s patience while I did so.  I was just trying to place a catalog sale order with Penney’s in one and it took forever.  I think the only reason the lady I talked with was so patient and kind was because I was a paying customer and we all know business is really bad for retailers.

But, I persevere. 

I mean, I’m only trying to break a habit of a lifetime.  At least 57 years we’re talking about.  In thinking about it philosophically, I’m wondering if this is in some way related to my telephone dreams.  (See last post.)  My last commenter there (my daughter, Rebecca) suggested that according to Scott Peck dreams are related to reality and that maybe I should try meditating on my life to see where my unresolved problems lie.  

That’s not a bad idea, whatever problems we have.  Except that I definitely add prayer in with the meditation.  And, you know?  I had another telephone dream Friday night, but in it I was somehow trying to think logically about the situation based upon some of the comments you guys left me.  I still couldn’t get through on the phone, but I wasn’t nearly as upset about it as I had been before.  So, maybe I’m making progress here with those dreams.

I’m trying just as hard to make progress with this new reality of my life.  It was actually very comforting to finally know exactly what my problems were and to have an explanation to give people.  Plus, there’s good news in this.  I can hear and comprehend on the phone much better with my right ear, if I can get used to using it (with or without the shoulder rest, but the rest sure helps so that I can write and type on the computer with it on.)  

So, y’all call, ya hear?!!  I look forward to "hearing" from you.  But, just promise to be good and ignore the first words out of my mouth for a while till I adjust, okay, and all of my fidgeting around with the phone.  

Cheers!  And many blessings to each of you today!  Dee

P. S. Tune in next time to hear about how Tom’s "free" night out to a concert last weekend (on Friday the 13th, no less, which could be where the problem started) ended up costing me (us) $3,238!