These shortening days gliding slowly into fall when the shadows lengthen no longer bring so much deep sorrow and grief to Tom and me as we think of his beautiful daughter Kim and my loving dad, but as the years have gone by bring more lovely reflections and remembrances.
I’ve written here each September since I began blogging about both Kim and my dad. The dates of their deaths are within 3 days of each other – the 14th and the 17th – although now my dad’s been gone 13 years (today) and Kim, seven, on Monday. So it is that the memories are intertwined.
I will not recount their deaths again here, but ask you to take a bit of time to share their lives with us by reading the posts w/photos I’ve written before that tell you and show you who they were and how brightly their spirits shone in our lives.
[See posts w/photos here (2005), here (2006 - this is more a meditation on life and death, w/links to some other posts about my dad here - my 2nd place writers' contest winner - and here - my 1st place writers' contest winner last summer ) and here (2008). I also refer you to two more meditations after I'd been in the Durango, Colorado ICU for four days while on vacation here and here.]
I realize that’s a lot of reading and some of you have read them before, but, if you will be so kind, please look at the photos and read through the ones you’ve forgotten or have never read. I hope they will calm you and give you peace, as they give me as I read them.
This year – I leave you with two remembrances that bring us joy. First, here is our latest photo of Hayley, now 11 1/2, who is the best and dearest of what Kim left behind as she grows and matures and begins to look uncannily like her mother.
The second comes from one of the three dresser drawers in my mom’s bedroom Mom’s left filled with my dad’s things – just as they were 13 years ago. Mom and I spent an entire morning looking through the drawers when I was there and laughed and laughed, remembering his quirky ways.
He was an engineer with an engineer’s precise mind and view of the world. Everything he ever touched, I think, he labeled. He also, apparently, unbeknownst to me until that morning, never threw away a single key he ever owned in the 73 years of his life.
I wanted to – and will one day when I have the time – take them all out of the two drawers they fill and count them. I’m sure his collection must be near 300. From very teeny, tiny keys to old computer locking keys to every key to every car he ever owned to . . . on and on. Most were on rings and many of the rings had labels attached to them in his meticulous engineer’s handwriting.
There was another similar to this one, but this one was the best and one day Tom and I plan on having a shadow box or key hanger filled with them here in our home. See what you think. Isn’t this about the funniest thing you’ve ever seen? I’m telling ya!
May God grant us each grace and peace and many joyous memories as we think of those we love who have gone on before us.
In Jesus Name, Dee
I have a CD that I picked up when driving through the Shenandoah Valley a couple of years ago on our way home from DC. Among other music, it has a song entitled “Those Who’ve Gone Before.” No words, just music, and I love it. At this time in my life, those words mean more than they ever have. God bless you and Tom with those joyous memories, grace, and peace as you remember your Dad and Kim.
May God bless both of you and your families during this time of remembrance.
such a lovely girl…blessings to you.
Wow. Never seen a keyring with that kind of honest self assessment before! Memories are powerful tools for healing or pain, depending on how we use them. God bless you for using them to bring joy and peace to us.
Hi Dee, I’m trying to play “catch up”. It’s been a hectic week for us.
Haley is so very pretty!
You and Tom are in my thoughts and prayers. Isn’t it wonderful that God gave us the gift of “remembrance”? I too have been doing a lot of reflecting this past week.
I love the keys, my dad made a piece of art out of driftwood and unusual barbaric looking old tools and outlined it with skeleton keys. I will have to send you a pic of it. It’s really cool.
God bless you!
Yep, Haley is cute as can be. I can’t imagine the loss of a daughter though I deal with families all the time who are going through that most difficult process. It’s good that time has brought you to a place where reflections are slowly replacing grief.
I LOVE that picture of the keys. When we moved, I had dozens of keys left from Long Beach and had no idea what they opened, but just could not allow myself to throw them away. When we moved the second time (into our purchased home), I finally just tossed them and haven’t needed a single one of them. Now if only I could throw out some of the stuff from my office drawers at Long Beach! I have a medium sized box almost filled with “stuff” that I will never use … until I toss it. Then I’ll have an immediate need for most of it.
A shadow box of his keys would be cool.